Osteen’s Hope for Today Bible

After Red Eye w/Greg Gutfeld went to commercial break, I began flipping through the channels and happened upon Joel Osteen’s weekly message of inspiration and positivity. I generally give him a few minutes to tell a good story and NOT preach the cross of Christ, repentance from sin, depravity of man, etc. before I turn the channel. As he was beginning one of his illustrations, I noticed an advertisement flash across the bottom of the screen. It heralded the availability of Osteen’s new bible: the Hope for Today Bible. My first thought was “How much of the text was redacted or removed?!?” I say this cynically, though I believe Osteen hardly preaches a biblical gospel.

So, out of sheer morbid curiosity, I surfed over to Osteen’s web site to find out a little more about this bible that just seemed to brim with positivity! The web site describes his new bible this way:

To help you in your faith journey, we are thrilled to offer you the brand–new Hope for Today Bible, with notes and encouragement from Joel and Victoria. This unique Bible highlights the power of hope that is found throughout all of Scripture. Written in the New Living Translation.”

It includes such special features as:
– Book Introductions with historical information for each book of the Bible
– HOPENOTES inspirational insights to help you apply God’s Word to your everyday life
– HOPE for TODAY devotionals from Joel and Victoria that are sure to encourage and inspire
– HOPEPOINTS word guides by topic that will help you find specific passages from God’s Word focusing on important life issues
– The Blessing: Joel and Victoria’s prayer for you; it claims and declares the promises of the Bible for your life

Now for all of you benefactors of God’s limitless financial blessing, there is a special offer available on the web site, but you must hurry because there are limited quantities of the Limited Edition Partner Bible.

This bible is very special. It is bound in genuine calfskin leather, is individually signed and numbered and limited quantities are available first to friends and partners!

How much would you expect to donate in order to receive one of these glorious bibles?

$50? Surely you jest!
$100? Have you not claimed your promise today?
$200? Where is your faith?!?

For a minimum gift of only $1,000 you can be the proud owner of this limited edition Partner bible!

Yes! ONLY $1,000!!! Is that too much to contribute to the Osteen empire, er, ministry? I am sure he only takes a meager salary and makes nothing from the sell of his books and cds.

Sarcasm aside, I find this to not only to be offensive ($1,000 for a bible?!?), but also very troubling. Peddlers of the Health-and-wealth gospel have been bilking the gullible for untold amounts of money for years, and now the Prince of Positivity is offering you the chance to be bilked out of a cool grand with a pearly-white smile. They ought to include with the bible a t-shirt that says “I gave $1,000 to Joel Osteen and all I got was this bible.”

Shameful.

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